Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
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