We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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