Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
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