hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
His nipple licking is glorious
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