i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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