Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
