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just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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