Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
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