just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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