Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Randomize
