Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Shame - the story of my life.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
