drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
