Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Randomize
