Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
