YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
