Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
