I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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