East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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