Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
