A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
