dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
