I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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