ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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