It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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