Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
