His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
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