living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
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