HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Randomize
