ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
