I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
