I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
