Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
