Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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