Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
