I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Randomize
