I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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