I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
