Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
