hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
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