Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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