sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Randomize
