Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
