This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
