Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
