im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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