Just cropdusted the office
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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