New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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