i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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