I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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