drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
